Scott Fowler: A twat with no insight

My god this isn't what I wanted to wake up to this morning.

Why? Why god why? Why in the christ would anyone put these two people in the same picture? What unhuman monster thought this was appropriate? I feel sick and want to go hide. It's like taking a picture of Stalin and Hitler, naked, and putting them together. Die Scott Fowler. Die.

Oh, he also wrote an article.

The Carolina Panthers are a balky car that needs a ton of work.

Fortunately, there's a great repair shop located in NFL land. It's called free agency, it opens Feb. 29 and it can get you where you want to go.

The tricky thing about this repair shop, though, is you have to know what's wrong with your car in the first place. This repair shop doesn't diagnose. The driver must know what he wants.

Walt Whitman he is not. Scott, two players just got released. One was a first round draft pick from 2001. The other was a huge free agent signing in 2005 that really didn't work out. There is enough potential here to write for weeks. Get Morgan or Wahle for an interview. Get their thoughts on things. Write about how this reflects poor choices in the front office (Spoon over Morgan, overpaying for Wahle). Write about where the Panthers go from here.

Don't write some gay extended metaphor about free agency you twat shit!

Coach John Fox and general manager Marty Hurney are driving the Panthers' car. For the past six seasons, they have kept it at 54 mph in all 55-mph speed zones. You can't be too careful.

Even blind gay men are screaming "JESUS CHRIST?!?"

Sportswriters are great backseat drivers.

I wish you'd backseat wrap your car around a tree, Scott.

After he recapped some things everyone knew and reached their same conclusions, he decided to suggest what the Panthers should do:

Then the Panthers should grab a power back to share the load with DeAngelo Williams. My No. 1 choice? San Diego's Michael Turner.

Turner turns 26 today. He is stuck behind LaDainian Tomlinson with the Chargers, but he's a 5-foot-10, 237-pounder with 4.4-second speed in the 40-yard dash. He could be the Stephen Davis of 2003 here. Turner has averaged 5.5 yards per carry in limited work in San Diego. Someone will make him very rich in free agency. Why not the Panthers?

Yes Scott, in the best running back draft the NFL has ever had, the Panthers should blow all their cap space on a guy who has been taking advantage of tired defenses who have had to chase down LdT all game. I'm sure he'd transition perfectly to a team without an offensive line. Wow, you sure are smart!

I bet Scott is a nice guy. He is probably fun to be around and enjoys his job. However, he clearly doesn't follow the NFL or the draft or college football. He doesn't care enough to get an interview. Judging by this article, he has no shame.

God.